I'm a slacker!

I'll admit, I just didn't feel like writing WIW at all last week, it was just one of those days when I felt like I really just didn't have anything to say, so why say anything at all??

Well, today I do have something to say, dang it! And that is that I am now at 170.. (insert name for female dogs with esssssss on the end.) What what! I'll be in the 160s soon enough - jeeeez, didn't think I'd see those numbers for quite a while, but here they come, creepin right along!

I really am okay with not losing weight rapidly anymore! I mean, it was kinda ridiculous how fast I lost in the very beginning, and I set the bar really high for myself, not that I'm complaining b/c those pounds are now a distant memory - forevaaa.

In some ways I kind of feel like each pound told a different story. That might sound crazy, and admittedly it probably is.. but each pound that I put on through the years had it's own sad story. Each one of those pounds was another weight on my shoulder, on my body, mind and soul. Each pound made me feel further away from my inner self and like a trap that I'd never get out of. I was burying myself in fat.

Woah, I don't think I've ever dropped the f-bomb in this blog. It's a strong word that I despise. To me "fat" is stronger than "hate." I'd rather someone hate me than call me fat.. is that weird? So be it. Losing weight has shown me how delusional I was. I still have plenty of meat on m'bones, but a lot less than I did when I was "morbidly obese" - eek! It makes me sad to think about the road I was on and where it was leading.. but then I snap out of it and look at how far I've come!

According to my BMI I'm still "obese"... in 6 or 7 pounds-ish I'll be "overweight." FINE BY ME! I like to blame my BMI on my vertically challenged body! The song 'I wish I were a little bit taller.. I wish I were a baller' comes to mind. I wouldn't wanna be a baller, but being a little bit taller would surely make a difference! It is what it is, I still embrace my short little self and I just wish my body would show some respect and proportion itself a little bit! I guess that's what Body Pump is for :)

Something that's been on my mind a lot lately - for good reason - is independence. It's something we all take for granted. Seriously. I'm not talking about war & peace, I mean, of course I'm grateful for everything that so many people fight for, for us, but I'm talking about independence on an individual level. It's crazy when you sit back and think about everything we're able to do when we have no ties that bind us.

There are so many material things I take for granted on a daily basis. Seriously. I am grateful for the people in my life everyday, but sometimes I forget to be grateful for the things that I have. Not in a materialistic way, but in a thank God I have a roof over my head, a car, and food on the table, basic way. I've been blessed in that I have been here at DSS for almost 3 years, good and bad. I've never in my career felt like my job was not secure simply because there are so many people that go without and are constantly in need, especially in this economy. And this is what I cry about when no one's around.

Is it just me or do sisters have a 6th sense? Mine just called as I was on the verge of tears and completely sidetracked me when I needed it, without even knowing! Love her.

I'm just really glad that I've done pretty well for myself, at the ripe old age of 26 (toot! toot!). I feel God brings me to and through tough things all the time, and He still knows that I'll come out stronger in the end. Sometimes I even inspire myself! I tend be one of those, "only want it when it's gone" kind of people.. I always regret not buying something or not waiting for something to go on sale because I can be indecisive to a fault. These days I'm in more of a, be glad for what you have, mentality, and I think I like that better.

Good things come when you least expect it, usually when you're living life right I suppose. I wasn't planning on going to the Zac Brown Band show tonight, although I desperately wanted to, I couldn't justify it in my budget - but lo and behold, I got a deal I couldn't pass up, and I will be in bearded, toboggan Heaven tonight!

"Life is good today" ~ Zac Brown Band :)

<3,

NMW